Tola Seng

Want to know a sure-fire way to achieve your goals? It’s a pretty simple solution. You might want to sit down because the simpleness might shock you. Here’s the guaranteed way to achieve your goals: All you have to do is just do your goals. You don’t need to do anything else. Anything you think you have to do in-between your goals is in actuality just preventing you from doing and ultimately achieving them.

Let me give you an example: Let’s say that your goal is to retire and live on a beach while surfing and playing the ukulele. Here’s what many people do to achieve/do this goal:

Go to college while collecting debt that they will pay off for most of their adult lives
Work at a job(s) they hate as a necessity for paying off their school debt for most of their adult lives.
Buy a house and other “necessary” items such as a car, big screen TV, etc. that put them into debt for the rest of their lives.
Work at more job(s) they hate as a necessity for paying off their credit card debt/loans they used to buy these “necessary” items.
Live an unhealthy lifestyle because they are overworked that give them diabetes, high-blood pressure, heart failure, depression.
Continue to work at more job(s) during their retirement to pay off their medical bills.
Hail Mary: Make their kids “help” give them their goals.

During this entire time, they are “taking the steps” to reach their goal, they are miserable, in pain, suffering and complaining about the “authorities” who hold them back. Worst yet, many have and raise kids whom may also have grand kids and then they proceed to tell them the “secret” to achieving their goals/dreams - which is to take the same above steps.

Does that make any sense to you at all? What has our school system, parents, government taught us, if that is the way they teach us to achieve our goals?

You want to know the best way to achieve your goal? Skip all of the garbage steps in-between and just do/achieve your goals.

Want to go and live on the beach while surfing and playing the ukulele? Then just go live on the beach and surf and play the ukulele. Really, it’s that simple. That’s all you have to do to achieve your goal.

Is your goal to spend more time with your kids? Then just spend more time with your kids.
Is your goal to find the love of your life? Then just go out and meet people.
Is your goal to live a healthy lifestyle? Then just live a healthy lifestyle.
Is your goal to get in shape? Then just exercise.
Is your goal to write a book? Then just write.
Is your goal to travel more? Then just travel.

So why don't we do this? Why is it so hard for most of us to achieve our goals? Because we make excuses why we can’t achieve our goals. Because we make reasons why we have to do “other” things first in order to achieve our goals. Because we believe others who tell us what we “must” do in order to achieve our goals.

Are you having a difficult time accepting this? Why is that?

Where do all these excuses, reasons, beliefs come from? Ultimately they come from our fears. Where do our fears come from? How do they control us? And how do we overcome them?

Want to know the answers? Then just subscribe to my newsletter to stay-up-to-date with the newest articles and postings.

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goals

Fear

By Tola Seng on 26 Jan 2012

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All worldly evils arise out of fear.
All fear arises out of ignorance.
Ignorance is the root of all evil.

Ignorance arises out of our identification with ego.
Our ego believes that it is separate from everything else.
Ignorance arises out of a false belief of separation.

Separation arises out of our identification with ego.
Ego is our false identity of who we think we are, not who we really are.
All worldly evils arises out of this falseness.

To prevent worldly evils is to step away from this falseness and see the truth.
To destroy fear is to see the truth.
To overcome ignorance is through understanding what is true.

The truth of who we really are is not ignorance.
The truth is we are not our egos.
We are not separate.

There is no I.
There is no YOU.
There is no separation.

There is only who we ARE.
There is only NOW.
There is only TRUTH.

All is ONE.
One is ALL.

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The Real Reason Why We Fail

By Tola Seng on 22 Apr 2010

categories:

The real reason why we fail

Image courtesy of jcoterhals

Have you ever been so enthusiastic about a new goal, put all your efforts into achieving it - only to find yourself falling short of its accomplishment? The worst part of it all, is that the more frequently this happens, the more you start to doubt yourself. After a string of failed attempts, you begin to actually believe that you are a failure and can't do anything right. Before you know it, you have given up on yourself.

Failure is not from lack of effort

Most people fail, not for lack of effort. More often than not, I see people try their hardest, give their most concentrated effort, and yet - still arrive short of the goal line. These people begin to doubt themselves. After hearing all the self-help advice about persistance, determination and resolve, it's easy to see why people begin to waver in their faith of themselves. "The problem is with me," they reason. "I'm not good enough." "I don't have enough drive." "I don't have enough passion." "I don't have enough focus."

It's not for a lack of effort that you fail. You've laid down your best intentions, put in all your focus, tried your best, yet somehow that just isn't enough. Time and time again, the miserable results speak for themselves. What exactly is going on here? Why do we fail at achieving our goals, when we place so much emphasis on them? Why do we continually beat ourselves up, thinking we don't have the necessary determination or persistance for getting what we really want?

The failure cycle

Most advice given seems to be on how to achieve a goal. But it's not enough for me to tell you how to get from point A to point B, if I don't also explain to you the obstacles and hardships you may face along the way - even if these dilemmas are just projections of your inner struggle.

That's like me telling you how to achieve your goal of walking to another country and not saying that there will be a little thing called an ocean that you will need to overcome. And when you fall short of your destination, instead of me telling you how to recognize and get around the ocean, I blame you for not being "persistant" enough. Ultimately, because you didn't expect an ocean and have no idea how to get around it, you give up on your desire of getting to a new country. Lastly, because I told you that all you needed was enough will power and strength, conclude that you don't have those qualities and therefore, will never amount to anything.

Repeat this scenario a few times and you can easily see why most people just give up on their desires all together. Sound familiar?

The failure trap

If it were so easy to make changes, to be successful, to create the lives we truly desire, to be happy and fulfilled, if it were just a matter of effort and will and hard work and motivation and dedication - then I will conclude, that everyone on this planet will have no problem achieving these goals. But that is not the case, obviously.

Just look around you. Look at yourself. Are there areas in your life where you've tried your hardest, and yet have little to show for it? And all this time, you have been fooled into believing that you weren't trying hard enough. That it was all just a matter of effort and determination. How much failures can you take before you come to the conclusion that all is just wasted effort? That somehow, you were just destined to fail. That the world is an unfair place. That God is playing some sick game with you. That you can no longer do anything about it.

When you get to this conclusion, then you no longer care to dream. You no longer desire. You kill the very essence of your soul that wants to experience new things, that wants to face new challenges, that wants to have the best of everything, that wants to love and play and laugh and cry. You settle, satisfied with your predicament. You no longer try. You give up on your hopes and dreams. You say, "I will no longer strive for more."

This is a very easy place to be in - I know I have been there. There are areas of my life, where I still feel that I am there. But you know what? The longer you stay in this place, the harder it is to get out from. In order to get out of this place, we must recognize the truth, the reality of why we are there in the first place. Why, our dreams never seem to come into fruition. Why our goals seem to fizzle after the intital excitement wanes. Why our successes seem to fall short of realization.

The real reason we fail

The real reason we don't get what we want is because we are unaware of the obstacles and hardships we will experience and have to overcome along the way. We've been conditioned and trained by all the sel-help books and advice we are given, that all we need to do to obtain our desires is use hard work and persistance. So eventually, when we fail to achieve our goals, we conclude that we don't have the necessary drive and determination. Ultimately, we begin to see ourselves as failures.

But what if you knew before-hand what problems and road blocks to expect on your journey? What if you were prepared on how to handle and overcome them? Wouldn't that knowledge be a tremendous help to you? Wouldn't you feel better about yourselve if you knew that your failures have nothing to do with your lack of persistance or will power, and instead had to do with your lack of experience and knowledge?

Failure demons

When trying to achieve a new goal, there will be new habits we must acquire and implement into our daily practice. We all know this to be true. New goals require new habits. We can't get someplace NEW by using the same OLD approaches.

The reason why our progress begins to stagnante and eventually comes to a screeching halt, is not because we aren't trying hard enough - it's because we are not aware of the obstacles, difficulties and problems that we will encounter along the way.

Once you are aware of the cause of these "demons" then you can identify them for what they are and "deal" with them. In other words, you won't let these demons get the best of your intentions and thwart your efforts.

Your Old Self

What is the cause of these demons? It is this: Your Old Self. All your past conditionings, habits and behaviours have created an identity of YOU as you are now in this moment. At this point in your life, you have identified yourself as "YOU" because of everything that you have done prior.

When you have a desire to achieve a new goal, you must take certain NEW actions in order to achieve that goal. What happens is that your Old Self, which is the accumulation of all your old patterns RESISTS the implementation of the NEW behaviours, which causes you to fail.

The Law of Advancement

Why does your Old Self sabotage your desires and goals? Simply for the fact, that it must, in order to survive. Yes, it does this for it's very own survival.

You see, there is a law of the universe that life always advances. Meaning life wants to move forward, to progress, and in order to advance, in order to move forward, it must survive. It must find a way to perpetuate its existence. If life were to die, there would be no more life. All things in the universe respect this law. All things fight for their own survival. All things have built-in defense mechanisms to sustain their presence.

Nothing just wilts and perishes on its own accord without providing some sort of strategy for leaving its mark or lineage along the way. That is the way of all life. That is the way of the universe.

Putting it all together

So, in your current situation, no matter what that is, you can see that you have created an identity for yourself. This identity is rooted and established on the patterns of behaviours that have brought you to your present circumstance. That is, the habits you have acquired that have placed you in this point in your life is what you associate your current identity with. It's the accumulation of all that you see around you - it is your experience of this reality. It is everything that you see, feel, hear and touch. Your identity is associated with these experiences.

Now, by trying to obtain a NEW goal, be it more money, better health, or greater relationships, you MUST get rid of certain old habits. That is, you cannot do the same things that have brought you to where you are currently now. You need to let go of specific habits and adopt new ones. What this entails, is to "destroy" your identity. This identity is your Old Self. On your path to acquiring new goals, you must destroy a part of your Old Self.

Remember, the Law of Advancement. Life wants to continue - to stay alive, to fight for it's survival. The same is true for this Old Self. It does not want to perish. It will do everything it takes to survive. And trust me, it is very effective. It is so effective, in fact, that everyone you know who has tried to achieve a new habit, who has tried to change their lives and who have failed - their failure can all be attributed to the effectiveness of the survival mechanisms of their Old Self.

More to come

Stay tuned for future installments in this series. I will show you what kind of defense mechanisms your Old Self uses to ensure its survival, how you can recognize these strategies, and some of the best, most effective ways to deal with them. I will show you how to stop your Old Self from running your life and how you can finally take the controls of your own ship.

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The Illusion Of Security

By Tola Seng on 05 Feb 2010

categories:

Health & Fitness

Love and Relationships

The Illusion Of Security

Photo courtesy of purplemattfish

There are few things in life we have grown to desire more than the sense of security. In fact, this desire is so strong that most of us live of our lives in a way that we feel guarantees as much security as possible. We tell ourselves that we must "play it safe, or else." We stick with a job we hate because of the security it provides us and our family. We avoid new experiences because of the "dangers" they entail. We stay in a love-less relationship because we fear that we cannot get a better one. To our detriment, by playing it safe - we have sold our lives short. We have given away our power to create the lives of our dreams for the sake of security.

What is Security?

Security is an illusion. It is intangible. You cannot hold or grasp it. It is an idea, a thought that is created in the mind. Why do we need this thought, this idea of security? We create the idea of security as an attempt to resolve feelings of fear. When we are fearful of something, we use security to make us feel better. We believe that it will protect us from the things we fear.

Security is a mental tool we create to help us cope with the painful feelings we associate with fear. It is a protection mechanism. It is based purely in the mind. Since all fears are illusions, the security mechanisms we create are also illusions.

Security Gives Your Power Away

When you maintain security, you are giving your power over to fear. You are letting fear control your life. You are saying, "it is more important that I manage my fears, rather than to do what I really want." Does that sound like a fun way to live your life?

Security Can Be Used Against You

There is a lot of money to be made by using your fears against you. Security is a tremendous selling point. When you are afraid, there are many things you would be willing to do to alleviate that fear, including paying an arm and leg for it.

Marketers, of course are privy to this, and use it to their advantage. They are masters of manipulating your fears. If you are not careful, you can give away all your energies toward buying and maintaining things that are merely illusions.

What things do you buy to quench your fears? Acne medicine because you are ashamed of your skin? Diet programs because you are embarrassed of your body? Pharmaceutical drugs because you are afraid of death? A college education because you are afraid of being poor? These things by themselves, are not the problem, but using them as a form of security is.

Remember, the source of life is one of love, advancement, growth and abundance. Do you desire to have a healthy, vibrant, rich, and energetic life? Then just focus your thoughts on this goal. By trying to prevent disease, poverty, sickness and hate, you are moving in the opposite direction of life. That is why these conditions always cause turmoil, frustration, anger and resentment.

You can't get what you want, by avoiding what you fear. For example, suppose you were in a dark room and afraid of the dark. What would be the best way to fill the room with light? Would you look for a light source, such as a light switch, candles, or a flashlight? Or would you run around the room trying to find a place to hide from the dark?

Security Prevents You From Attracting What You Really Want

There's a vicious cycle that happens when you search for security in your life, and that is, the more you desire something, the more it pushes you away from what you really want. You become like the dog chasing his tail. You never get what you desire, because you are running a circular pattern that leads to nowhere. Once you start walking the wrong direction, the next thing you know, your dreams become a distant memory.

The cycle looks like this:

You desire something.
You associate a fear with that desire.
You search for security that will alleviate that fear.
You feel better.
Rinse, wash and repeat.

The more you desire something, the more fear you feel, and the more security you seek.

If we are not aware of this cycle that is taking place, we can become addicted to security. We hold onto security instead of moving towards what we truly desire. Unknowingly, we push ourselves further away from our wishes and dreams.

Break Loose From the Cycle

Your best bet to reconnect with your desire is to break free from the vicious cycle you have created for yourself. It is like you put on a blindfold over your own eyes and never realize you have them on. Imagine how tough it would be to win a race if you couldn't see. When you start to remove the blindfold of security, you will begin to see clearly.

When you know that you are safe regardless of anything that may happen, then you no longer need the illusion of security. If you think life is harmful, then you will be living in fear. Out of this fear, you will be seeking security in life.

Life is not harmful. Life is not out to hurt you and destroy you. On the contrary, life is meant to nourish you - it is helpful. It is abundant, loving and always advancing. When you realize this, you will no longer search for security in life. Rather, you will begin to enjoy life.

Since security and fears are illusions, you no longer hold onto them. You let them go and no longer give your energy to something that isn't real. Rather, you immerse yourself in the splendor and beauty that is life.

Practice Safety Rather Than Security

There is a difference between security and safety. Security is a false illusion. A belief that by doing or having something, our fears will go away. It limits us, because it prevents us from achieving what we really want. The more we seek security, the further we move away from our desires.

There is nothing wrong with safety. Being safe is practical and intelligent. We don't attach emotional fears with safety. We practice safety as a precaution.

Safety is buckling your seat belt when you drive; security is not wanting to drive for fear of crashing. Safety is practicing safe sex; security is not having sex for fear of pregnancy or STDs. Safety is teaching your kids to learn and think for themselves; security is sheltering them. Safety is learning how to protect yourself from physical violence; security is staying at home all day. Safety is learning all you can about the business you want to start; security is never taking any financial risks.

Where Do You Seek Security?

Identify the areas in your life where you are comfortable. This is often a sign that you are living with the illusion of security. Would you rather be in a comfortable relationship, or a loving relationship? A comfortable job, or a fulfilling job?

When you settle for something less than what you really want, you are giving your power away to the illusion of security. How smart is that, trying to hold onto something that isn't even real? It is better to acknowledge the areas in your life where you do seek security rather than lying to yourself and pretending they don't exist. In this way, you allow yourself the opportunity to work on it, improve it or change it.

Instead of saying, "I don't really want a fulfilling job, I am happy with my crappy job," speak the truth and say, "I am staying in my crappy job, because I am not yet ready to go out and find a fulfilling job." In this way, you stay honest with yourself and maintain your power to obtain your real goals.

Are the aspects of your life where the illusion of security has become more important than your happiness? Can you see how holding on to security is preventing you from reaching your truest desires? It's time to remove the blindfold.

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Financial Prosperity

By Tola Seng on 29 Jan 2010

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Financial Prosperity

Photo courtesy of Photos8.com

My primary goal for 2010 is to experience financial prosperity. I choose the words financial prosperity for a very specific reason. Previously, I have used the terms financial freedom and financial abundance. I feel like I have experienced both financial freedom and financial abundance. Let me explain. Financial freedom to me is to be free from the "ball and chain" of money - to no longer be a slave to money. In the past, I felt like money controlled my decisions and therefore my reality. I don't feel that way anymore. The choices I make now are based on what experiences I desire to have.

When it comes to financial abundance, I also feel like I have achieved this. I view financial abundance as being able to financially meet all of my needs. To me, it is about knowing that all of life is abundant - that whatever you desire, you will receive. My insight came when I realized that it didn't require a ton of money for me to meet all my needs. I went through a period of having little money and discovered that I still felt abundant! In other words, my feelings of abundance have no monetary value whatsoever. I feel abundant regardless of how much or little money I have.

So when I decided to focus on money this year as my primary goal, I needed a new intention. I feel that I have already achieved financial freedom and financial abundance. Now what I want to experience is financial prosperity. I want monetary growth. I want wealth. This is a big difference for me. Previously, I've wondered why I hadn't received wealth, but I now realize that you receive exactly what you ask for. What I am asking for now is to experience monetary accumulation and excess.

In light of this resolution, I write this article to help you understand how to attract more money into your life. I will identify some of the major limiting beliefs that block your access to receiving money. I will give you empowering and positive beliefs about money that you can use to have financial prosperity in your own life.

Beliefs

I will go into more depth on beliefs in a future article, but for now here's a summary.

Beliefs are the framework with which we build our lives. They shape the choices we make, which in turn create the reality that we experience. If you can instill the beliefs that will help you in shaping the reality that you desire, then you can become the creator of your destiny!

The reality you are currently experiencing is the result of belief programs that are running in your consciousness. If you are living in a reality which you do not desire, then there are beliefs that you have that are preventing you from obtaining them. Your job as the creator of your life, is to identify these beliefs, remove them and replace them with beliefs that will assist you in realizing your goals.

When we live our lives unconsciously, we hand over our power to choose our own beliefs to "external" forces, such as our parents, teachers, friends, society, media or the government. Instead of choosing the beliefs that are positive for us, we are unknowingly programmed with the beliefs of others. More often that not, these "unconscious" beliefs do more harm than good because they are not in alignment with our goals.

When you start to live consciously, you see that you have the power to choose your own beliefs. In this way, you can choose beliefs that help you achieve the goals and desires you want to experience.

How would you rather live, consciously or unconsciously?

Limiting Beliefs About Money

Beliefs that block or limit us from achieving our goals are called limiting beliefs. Before you consciously choose empowering beliefs about money, it is good to be aware of the current limiting beliefs that you currently have.

The following limiting beliefs have to deal with the fact that you cannot have what you condemn. In these beliefs, you feel that either people who have money are bad, or money itself is bad. By associating negative qualities to these things, you prevent yourself from having money because you don't want to be a bad person.

Belief: People with money are bad

People who have money are evil.
People who have money are greedy.
People who have money are selfish.
People who have money are rich snobs

Belief: Money itself is bad

Money is the root of all evil.
Money is the cause of all problems.
More money more problems.

Belief: It's hard to make money

Money doesn't grow on trees.
It takes hard work and discipline to make money.
You need to have money in order to make money.
The rich get richer and the poor get poorer.

Belief: I'm not deserving of money

I'm not good enough to have money.
I'm not smart enough to make money.
I can't make money.
Money doesn't like me.
I'm not meant to have money.
Every time I have money, I lose it.

My Own Limiting Belief About Money

My main limiting belief about money that I have identified within myself is the belief that "money is more valuable if I work hard and struggle for it." You see, I get a sense of accomplishment from hard work. If I don't work hard, toil and sweat for something then I don't enjoy it as much. It is part of a larger belief I have that "something is worth more, the harder you work for it." In other words, the value of something is directly related to the effort spent in obtaining it.

You can get a sense of how this belief has shaped my experience in life. On one hand, I enjoy having money I work hard for, but on the other hand, I felt guilty whenever I receive money easily. If I receive money without hard work, then I feel like I don't deserve it. Do any of you have this belief? How do you feel when people give you a gift of money? Do you feel gracious and thankful - do you enjoy the gift? Or do you feel guilty in some way? Like you don't deserve the money? Maybe, you feel that there are "better" uses for the money than to give it you. What type of signal do you think this is sending to the Universe?

Empowering Beliefs About Money

Belief: Money does not make people bad or good

People ultimately have the choice of what to do with their money.
Money is a tool that can be used for good or evil - the responsibility is with the user.
There are a lot of loving, caring and compassionate people who have money.

Belief: Money can be a good thing

There are many good things that you can do with money.
Having money increases your choices and thus the number of experiences you can choose from.
Money can be used to make a positive difference in the world.
Money is a useful tool.

Belief: It's easy to make money

I don't need money in order to make money.
Making money is a skill I can learn.
It's fun to make money.
It's fun to spend money.
I enjoy having money.

Belief: I can have as much money as I want

The amount of money I have is only dependent on how much money I desire to have.
No matter what my position in life, I have the ability to make money.
I can have whatever I choose.

Choose Your Experience

Having more money is not necessarily better or worst than having less money - it is simply a different experience to have. Money gives you more choices, more possibilities. By having money you may choose to experience a wider range of possibilities. You may choose to use money, or you may choose not to. However, if you don't have money, your choices are limited because you may only choose the experience of not using money.

As the creator of your reality, you can decide which experience you want to have. I've already experienced a period of time of not having any money - I know what it's like. Now my choice is to have the experience of having financial prosperity. What about you - do you want to experience life with little money? Or do you want to experience life with a lot of money?

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New Year, New You: How to Streamline Your Life

By Tola Seng on 16 Jan 2010

categories:

Health & Fitness

Love and Relationships

New Year, New You: How to Streamline Your Life

Photo courtesy of lee_sie

With the beginning of a new year, come new resolutions. Many of us are once again, looking to better our lives by adding more to it. Before you embark on your goals, I suggest you take a step-back and take stock of your current inventory. Look at the areas in your life where you can have less, instead of more. By removing, substituting or decreasing particular factors in your life, you will put yourself in a better position to add the new habits and goals that you desire. Remember, a masterpiece is first started on a blank canvas. You can't create the masterpiece of your life if your canvas is already cluttered with paint.

Often when we try to improve our lives we look at what we can add to it - a new car, a new house, new relationships, more money, more friends. We think that by obtaining more, our lives will be better and therefore, we will be happier. More often than not, our "improvements" have the opposite effect. Instead of adding to our lives, the new items bog us down. They become a burden. We are left with more bills, more repairs, more responsibilities and more headaches. What we thought would make our lives richer has instead made our lives more stressful. Tyler Durden, in the movie Fight Club explains it nicely, "the things you own, own you."

This article will look at ways you can streamline your life. Efficiency is an overlooked point when it comes to life improvement. An efficient engine is one that can get the most work done with the least amount of time and energy. Maximize your potential, by making your life more efficient.

Donate/Sell/Discard Used or Unwanted Items

In the past year, I've donated countless bags full of clothes. I never realized how much clothes I had until I went through them all. I was actually a little shocked. Some items I had never worn. With some, I couldn't remember how I obtained them - did I buy them? Was it a Christmas gift? A birthday present? Who knows? Many yet were worn only once and then forgotten. By donating the clothes that where no longer a match for me, I have given myself the opportunity to receive new and better clothes.

Equally important, is that I have come to make smarter decisions when it comes to buying clothes. I realized that much of the clothes I didn't want were of lower quality. The clothes I now have in my closet are better made and of higher quality materials. They also fit me better. By getting rid of my old clothes, it freed up my energy to receive items that are a better match for who I am.

It has also made me a smarter shopper. I came to see that I bought a lot of clothes on impulse. I was shopping for the sake of shopping and not really considering if I really wanted these clothes. I was a sucker for a good bargain. If something was a "steal," I just had to have it. I felt like I was actually doing myself a favor by spending money on clothes that were on sale. As those very same pieces of clothes were placed into my donation bag, I realized I had spent money on something I never even wore. How's that for saving money?

Donating your used or unwanted items not only benefits you, but benefits the people who need these items as well. It's a win-win situation for everyone.

Cutting Ties With People Who Hold Your Back

When we move forward in our lives, our friends, families, peers and lovers may not want to come along for the ride. They may disagree about our growth, hiding their resentment behind a facade of friendship and love. In these situations - it is best to loosen the ties you associate with them. Don't allow other people to bring you down.

You always have the power to choose. And choosing a supportive group of people who you spend time with is one of the best choices you can make. I know, you can't choose who your family is, but you can choose how much time you allot with them. Often times, the people who love us the most, unknowingly hold us back the most. They either don't want to see us get hurt or they don't want to see us succeed. In either case, you must remove yourself from that environment. You deserve to be in fulfilling, supportive and loving relationships. Don't deny yourself that experience.

Breaking things off with people you care about is not the easiest choice you can make, but is beneficial for both parties. I know you care deeply about them and your best intentions are to help, but the best way to do that is to rise above and inspire them from above to do the same.

You may find that your time spent apart with them will bring you closer together later down the road. In the present moment, you must do what is best for you. Making the most out of your life is the best thing you can do for yourself and in one way or another, will eventually help everyone around you.

Purge. Eliminate Wasteful, Non-Productive habits.

Like old clothes that no longer fit, there are habits and activities we do that may no longer be a match for the person we currently are or want to be. The number one New Year's resolution people have is to get into shape. These people buy new gym clothes, get a new gym membership, buy the latest exercise equipment, or buy a new diet book. They obtain whatever they think will help them. But guess what? They failed to remove the old habits from their lives. They still drink soda, don't get enough sleep, eat fast food, etc. If you want to be a healthy person, then you must first get rid of your unhealthy habits.

Bad habits also eat away at our time. Whatever resources we are short of, we can always find a way to get more. However, one resource we can't get more of is time. We have a finite amount of time here on earth. You can't complain about not having enough time do the things you want, if you spend most of your time watching tv. Get rid of tv watching or web surfing, the top time-consumers. Go a few days without tv and see how much more free time you have. Not only will you free up your time, but you will do your mind a favor by not bombarding it with the useless and harmful programming that's out there.

Outsource/Delegate

When it comes to do doing things we hate, most of us just grit our teeth and bear it. It doesn't have to be this way. Living a life you enjoy means not having to put up with things you hate. What's the point? How beneficial is it to anyone that you do something you despise? It's definitely not beneficial to you. How could it be beneficial to your loved ones if you are unhappy? It's not beneficial to the people who receive the end result of your work because if you are doing something you hate, then you are most likely doing a second-rate job.

Do yourself and everyone else a favor by outsourcing or delegating the activities you don't enjoy doing. Yes, there is someone else in the world who will do it for you and there are even people who will enjoy it. Let's not deny these people the pleasure of doing the work you dread. By giving them your work, you are increasing the happiness in the world.

With the internet and next-day shipping, we can get anything we want and connect to people all over the world in an instant. For a price, you can pay someone to do almost anything you despise for you. You don't have to pay an arm and a leg either. You'd be surprised how affordable a personal assistant is.

Strapped for cash? That's what's friends are for! Most of your buddies would be willing to help you do almost anything - from moving out of your apartment to bailing you out of jail. The most it might cost you is a lunch. If you have kids then it's even better. Free labor! Teach your kids the value of hard work by having them mow the lawn, take out the trash and vacuum the house.

The point is, you don't have to do chores that you despise or dread. By delegating or outsourcing these tasks, you free yourself up to do more of the things you love and enjoy.

Declutter

Go Digital. In this day of digital technology, we really don't need to hold onto physical paperwork anymore. By going digital, not only will you save planetary resources, you will simplify your life. You will not have to deal with the hassles of owning physical assets, including storing, searching and moving them. Start with your bank statements. Most banks want you to go paperless since they will save money on mailing expenses.

Pay your bills online. Most every bill you currently pay can be paid online. You will save money on stamps and the hassle of going to the post office. Set up automatic payments and you won't ever have a late bill again - sparing you from those outrageous late fees.

Sign up for no mailing list. Save yourself the time having to sort through the endless amount of junk traffic you receive and sign up for a no mailing list. You will also save resources and prevent yourself from signing up for a credit card on impulse.

Consolidate.

Google Voice. I've just started to use google voice and have to say that I am impressed with what it offers. Aside from the useful features, the main selling point for me is to be able to consolidate all my phone numbers into one number. The ability to manage your phone/text communications through one portal makes things easier.

Merge your credit cards. If you have more than two credit cards, do yourself a favor and merge them. Everyone and their mom now offer credit cards. Why? Because they make tons of money on their sky-rocket interest rates and their vomit inducing late fees. Don't fall into the trap. And if you already did, then get yourself out. Find one card that offers the incentives you want and use that. Have another debit card and a business credit card if you have one. That's it. No worries and no getting yourself into more debt.

Minimize.

Slim down your wallet. Are you one of those guys who carry a wallet the size of a loaf of bread? Do your back a favor and replace it with a slim card wallet. No, you don't need to carry photos of your family or your grocery store rewards card. All you need in there is some form of id and one or two credit/debit cards. If you can, carry your wallet in your jacket pocket. Sitting on a wallet is not only extremely uncomfortable, it is also bad news for your back.

Use a money clip. By money clip I don't mean a rubber band. Pick one that suits your taste. You can get a separate money clip or you can get a slim card wallet that also has a money clip on it. Not only will you free yourself from having to carry a big wallet, but flashing a money clip looks pretty darn cool.

Lose weight/body fat

Now that you've removed all the excess around your life, let's not forget removing the excess on yourself as well. Lose weight, but more specifically - lose body fat. I'm not going to go into all the health benefits of having less body fat. Read my article on the importance of physical fitness. If you want some advice on losing weight, then read this forum post - how to get a toned body.

Free Your Energy

Holding onto things requires energy. We must give them our attention, even if it is just to maintain them. Instead of wasting your energy and power on things that no longer matter to you, remove them from your life. Realize that all your possessions represent who you are. You are always sending out a signal to the Universe. If you are holding onto things in your life that you no longer want, you are saying "I want better, but I am settling for less." Is that the type of vibe you want to send out to everyone you come across? How would you feel about somebody who has this mentality? Are you more likely to think highly of them? Would you want to spend more time with this person or less time?

If something is no longer of value to you, or worst, is holding you back from getting what you really desire, then you must free up your energy that you use to maintain that item so that it may be directed towards getting what you want. Our attention is limited. You must make the most out of it by using it to focus on the things you want. It is a freeing feeling to let go of objects that no longer serve you. You feel lighter. You have more energy.

When you start to feel better about your life, you begin to enjoy your life. When you enjoy your life, you create a better life for yourself. By creating a better life for yourself, you create a better life for everyone as well.

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Power Quote - Dr. Joseph Murphy

Whatever thoughts, beliefs, opinions, theories, or dogmas you write, engrave, or impress on your subconscious mind, you will experience them as the objective manifestation of circumstances, conditions, and events. What you write on the inside, you will experience on the outside. You have two sides to your life, objective and subjective, visible and invisible, thought and its manifestation.

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Power Quote - Albert Einstein

Physical concepts are free creations of the human mind, and are not, however it may seem, uniquely determined by the external world.

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The Success Formula: How to Start and Finish Any Goal. Part 2

By Tola Seng on 02 Sep 2009

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